chocolate pizza?

i've always rolled my eyes at novelty pizzas. when dairy queen offered that frozen ice cream pizza thing in the 90s, i was disgusted.

"pizza's already junk, who wants it to be even junkier?"

fifteen years later, apparently i do.

i thought we were joking: "haha, let's get a chocolate pizza." sort of like, "haha, let's go to vegas, get drunk and then get married." it seems like such a trashy, vulgar idea that no one would ever want to draw it into reality. but we did.

i'm not quite sure how the pizza guys did this. the crust was an 18" sheet (there were two of us, after all) that had been split and the bottom piece, slathered with nutella. (pause: i know, i know, if you've ever traveled to europe, you probably discovered nutella on the same trip that you discovered manu chao and you think it's a godsend, you may have even just moaned, europe is so much better than america, blah, blah, blah.) the crusts were then sealed back together, covered with powdered sugar, strawberries and some other chocolate sauce, that may have been nutella but i'm not really sure on account of i lost all sensation in my mouth from the sugar burn.

this was maybe the first time i didn't finish a pizza.

i don't really know what to say. delicious, overwhelming, america's coq au vin...

non-sequitor: i once had a french friend offer me "american champagne." it was coca-cola.

the most interesting thing about this pizza is that it shows, in one quick glance, everything that is wrong and everything that is right with america.