napa 10/9/09

napa has always annoyed me. it seems like a pretty useless place; yuppies running to and fro, buying locally produced cheeses named after cities and climatic conditions, smugly double parking their lexuses while wearing lacoste...so i was pretty surprised that i suggested having lunch there.

i was worried that i'd end up having to eat something stupid like a locally-sourced butter lettuce salad with some fresh, locally-made croutons, sprinkled with some dumb local olive oil. luckily for me, though, gardenburgers have infiltrated the bucolic yuppie colony. not that gardenburgers are particularly innovative, but at least i don't feel like a second-class citizen eating them, which is more than be said for most vegetarian menu options. this double-pattied burger was made with american cheese, which was good, because i hadn't eaten anything with the consistency of polymers in a while.

these fries were delicious. they're called garlic fries, but really, they were pesto fries. they were coated in garlic, olive oil and basil. they were served with ranch dressing because the waitress didn't give us a choice and called the pairing "the dynamic duo." i don't know that i'd call slathering french fries with ranch dressing "dynamic," so much as "artery-clogging," but it was an acceptable combo.

two burgers and fries came to over $40, which makes me feel like i should have been served a gardenburger that had been massaged by a farmer, but i'm in napa once every four years, so i'll get over it.

i went to get a fleur de sel cupcake afterward, but i was stuffed so i opted instead for a bottle of water whose label described its contents as "velvety and smooth." between my fabric water and brioche bun, i'm pretty set for the day. hopefully i'll be eating my next meal in reality.